Thursday, December 5, 2013

The co-passenger blues


When you are damn sure that you are going to spend 12 hours in train, the first thing that anyone wants is good co-passengers. After all, for how much time you can remain immersed in a book, do train spotting and see scenery when it is pitch dark and police wants you to close windows to avoid getting robbed. Scanning the reservation chart list at the station is one of the few things you can do if you arrive with a healthy lead before departure. The eyes drool over finding co-passengers having age F-18 to F-24 and cursing yourselves when you find aged aunties in your bay of six. I am not a taxonomist but here is assorted list:

1. The Oldies:
Only God can save you in such a situation when the oldies pull down the middle berth at 20:00 hours sharp leaving you nowhere to sit. They eat around 19:00 hours and go off to sleep early. I have seen oldie who had his daily quota of whisky before dozing off. It was his medicine that emitted a foul smell in the whole AC bay. Also they snore a lot that the whole coach vibrates and you can say good bye to your sleep until you fall asleep to the rhythmic snoring!

2. The Middle aged people:
This group of people I feel is the best for the company when traveling for one night journey. They understand the need of youngsters and at least try to pull the middle berth by 22:00 hours. They off course have endured more ups and downs in life than us and chatting with them is pleasant experience. They have too much knowledge and give useful advice to us. I have seen a SBI assistant general manager explain me homoeopathy with a new twist to a cement industry manager giving me good insights about why men and women behave differently in nature. This group of people accounts to best conversation I have ever had with the some unknown people.

3. The aunties:
They are sometimes caring, nagging or jealous with you. The first thing they ask is for lower berth which you have booked for window seat. They ask all about your personal life, where do you stay, where do you eat and all sort of stuff as if they are writing my biography. Some of them are kind enough to share food with you.

4. The young couple:
The young couple is sometimes occupied with a small child with whom they have to play a day and night game. The small child is centre of all their attention that they hardly interact with the co-pax. Sometimes when they do they get time after a child falls asleep, they open a plethora of information about themselves and have met a Ph.D. who had done his doctorate in oncology to a scientific writer in pharma industry. I have also seen a young couple who boarded with me at a particular station just pull the curtains of the side lower berth and drink their “homemade magic potion” while emitting a strong stench again in compartment.

5. A large joint family:
It looks to me that the head family has bribed the loco pilot of the train to halt for extra time so that they whole joint family can board the compartment with all assortment of luggage and place it wherever they find place below the seat. After the dust settles, they start munching which has been bought from outside. Looks to me that they have even bought a tomato ketchup sauce bottle to keep them company for everything they have bought from outside. Finally the munching stops when it is time to sleep and they sign it off by eating pills for easy digestion. Just imagine the horror the other people might face at night in closed AC compartment.
Advice: Use train toilet before they wake up!

6. Youngsters:
This is the best group you can have for company. At the start they can be slow to start a healthy conversation but slowly you can have a good time with them that the time passes quickly. You can talk with them about ‘chaos theory’ to the popular sitcoms in the town to sports. I have been a group that was awake till 3 a.m. at night which was one of the best journeys I ever had in my life.

7. F18-F24:
Nothing much to say as they don’t talk with anyone. I leave it to your imagination!